Archive for April 2011

Pat looked at me, sort of sprawled out in my chair, and said, “Look how you are so ‘at ease’ this morning.”

… what I noticed was that at the point where I was to feel my feelings in my body, I was blank. In this moment I realized that I do not recognize the experience of feeling my feelings.

I was aware that I was choosing to surrender more fully to the process of this modality of breathwork, to letting go and letting the breathwork take me where it would.

In the early pages I was struck by the clarity Progoff gave of how one’s spiritual/religious life can deepen from surface doctrines and traditions of worship of one’s chosen religion or philosophy to the highly individualized work of deep spiritual transformation.

Dropping deeper, I shared a strong part of my negative intentionality — one that I have become increasingly aware of in the last year or so. There is a part of me that delights in bad news

…our coffee time brought up the challenge we both seem to have of connecting emotionally with others, with each other, and even with ourselves.

Pat asked, “What do you want from life, Gary?” I found I could come back with what I felt was a satisfying answer.

Beautiful time with Pat the day before, but this day — it was last Thursday — I got all knotted up in my underwear again.

The intensity of the journey has been high these past two weeks. Inwardly and outwardly.

Pat’s and my Sunday morning coffee time began with Pat wondering about the personality dissolving into nothingness upon death.